Monday, September 28, 2009

100 Things That Bring Me Joy

1.God; He is my everything and I cannot express the incredible joy my heart is filled with by His awesomeness!
2.My family; They have been there for me through it all and they are my most precious treasures
3.My friends, particularly Natalie, Angelle-Marie, Christina, Kelly, Kori, Barrett, Jason, Michael, Zach, Breton, Adolfo & Cashel, Amy, Scott, David, Daniel, Dorissa, Brooke, and Lauren
5.Elderly people
12.Making people laugh or smile
13.Watching people enjoy life
14.Reading a good novel
15.Watching a good romance
16.Seeing people in love
17.good films
18.Watching Ballet
19.Watching Figure Skating
20.Floating in the water
21.Dressing up
25.Witty dialogues
29.Plant life
30.Long walks in the woods
31.Long walks in an open field
32.Long walks in general
33.The beach
34.The mountains
36.Helping people know how wonderful they are
37.Dancing/running/walking in the rain
38.Mystery movies/shows
41.The Eucharist
43.Holy Priests/Religious
44.Beautiful architecture
46.Not having to shop
47.Successful shopping trips
52.Knowing (parts of) foreign languages
53.Learning about other cultures
54.Learning about other people
55.Getting to know people really well
56.Being trusted/confided in
57.Ice skating
58.Roller blading
60.Throwing the football
62.Funny stories/jokes
63.Formal etiquette
64.Being barefoot
65.Slop soccer
67.Feeling beautiful
68.The Disney magic
69.Fairy Tales
70.Star Wars
71.The Lord of the Rings
72.Star Trek
73.“Anne of Green Gables” (books and films)
74.“An Old Fashioned Girl”
75.“Rose In Bloom”
76.“Pollyanna Grows Up”
77.“Heidi Grows Up”
78.The Scarlet and the Black
79.The Last Samurai
80.Feeling loved
82.Being healed (especially from the non-physical wounds)
84.Pretty clothing
85.Designing clothes
86.Duets with Audrey
87.Happy endings
88.The color blue
90.Starry nights
92.Singing in the Moonlight
93.Accomplishing things on my to-do list for my life
94.Witnessing people's talents
97.Writing letters
98.Receiving letters
99.Getting packages in the mail
100.Improving myself

Wednesday, September 9, 2009



(all I can see when I close my eyes are Chinese characters)

I am all "Chinesed" out. I love that I am learning this language, but I wish so much that I was more efficient at it. I just stayed up 'till two in the AM to finish my fourteen pages of Chinese workbook homework. I started said homework at six o'clock PM. I need say no more.


Monday, September 7, 2009

I just want you to know

I love my friends!!!! They are each so different and so amazing! They help me to be my best self. Thanks y'all!


Wednesday, September 2, 2009

Know Thyself

Brace yourselves for some serious over-thinking.

Detracion - a lessening of reputation or esteem especially by envious, malicious, or petty criticism

Gossip - to relate a rumor or report of an intimate nature

Okay, so these two sins, or negative habits(if that term is more comfortable) are very possibly the most socially acceptable way of harming one another. Lately, I've been thinking a lot about the effects of these two vices and these are some things that really struck me about myself.

When I am hurt or offended someone, I find it easy to share that and and the details of why I'm upset with some friend of relative or support. There are so many problems with that. First, I know within myself that I would feel deep shame if the person about whom I was speaking over heard my words or later learned of them. Second, most of my friends and acquaintances know each other. That means that my words could potentially be very damaging to the person I'm speaking of, the person I'm speaking to, their relationship, and my relationship with both people. I hate gossip and detraction. I feel as if no good comes from either of these vices. But let's not kid, I am so frequently guilty of gossip that it's ridiculous.

It doesn't make sense. I am so strongly opposed to the vices, yet I am readily guilty of them. Why is that? Well, I think that it's partly because when I'm upset about something, it's easier for me to complain about it to a third party than to address it with the person in question. Also, when I know someone is going through a rough time, my tendency is to tell others the specifics of that in order to give them incentive to join me in praying my friend through that troubled time. Finally, when someone asks me about my day, I find it difficult to answer honestly without giving the details of whatever conflicts or potential conflicts have taken place that day.

Why does any of this matter? Well, nearly everyone takes part in gossip or detraction. Lately that fact has been disturbing me greatly. Why? It's disturbing me because I've been wondering, what do people say when they gossip about me? I've never really liked to think of myself as the subject of gossip - I doubt anyone really does - but the idea of my faults, weaknesses, and personal life becoming the center of someone else's conversation, especially if that someone else is a friend that I love and trust, is very unsettling. This, in turn, makes me wonder how my friends feel. Even if I rarely say anything about them, what would they say if that knew about such and such time where I wasn't a good friend and said too much?

I know that my friends are wonderful and they care a great deal about me, but that only makes me feel my guilt more keenly. They don't deserve gossip or detraction from me. They deserve to be upheld, not to have their actions opened up for the discussion, judgment, and perhaps mockery of others. How easy it is for some misunderstanding to come about from one story about someone that is taken out of the context of their life, motives, and usual personality and actions. Once people get ideas about one another, it's hard to break them. It's a cliche' statement and yet, if we really think about it, we know it to be true.

I'm writing about this on my blog because it's on my heart. The purpose of this post is not to lecture anyone and I am not writing it to correct someone else's tendencies towards gossip and detraction. This is about my own tendency and the tendency of others in general. If anyone feels an ill-disguised reproof in this post, it's not from me, but maybe there's a reason for it.

I do, however want to issue a general apology. To all of my friends whom have ever become the subject of my gossip, to all the friends whom I have talked about instead of talked to (regarding grievances and problems), to all the friends who's secrets I didn't keep, and to all of the friends who feel betrayed by my idle words, I am sincerely sorry. I am going to make a concrete effort to change and the reason why is because I love you. I want to be worthy of your trust and your friendship. Please be patient with me for I am slow to learn. Have a good day!