In 32 days, I will graduate from undergrad. I began this blog during my freshman year and struggles with the associated changes in my life. Nearly four years later, change is still my dependable adversary. I've already begun the hunt for work and the process of just trying to sort out which direction to start pursuing. This is my least favorite part of the process. I am not fond of uncertainty.
I would like a great big sign that just points me in the best direction. At times like this, I find it hard not to envy those people who have such perfect clarity about where they want to go and what they want to do. I know that uncertainty can mean many possibilities, but it just feels like a great big void. I know a few people who are undergoing similar struggles with these choices. So what do we do?
We keep on keeping on, of course. There is not time for panicking and certainly no time for delay. Nearly any decision is better than indecision. People keep asking me what I wan to do after I graduate. While I have a few ideas running around in my head, my answer is usually, "I want to get a job". That response is usually met with rolled eyes, but that really is as specific as I can get for now. I want to get a job and pay of loans. I don't want to lose all of the Chinese that I've been studying for the last three years. Other than that, I'm open to an overwhelming amount of possibilities.
I keep switching between panicking and soaring when I think about all that may lie ahead of me. I'm told that's normal, which is comforting in its way. All in all, I'm just ready to move out of this limbo phase and into some sort of new direction. Here's to whatever the future holds!