Wednesday, May 14, 2008


Each day that passes, I learn something new. I learn from the people around me. I learn about patience, love, courage, wisdom, kindness, perseverance, strength, laughter, endurance, faith, and holiness. With each lesson that I learn I feel something tugging gently on my heart. It whispers to me promises of a secret waiting for me in the future.

I try to peer through the curtain that veils my future, but it is too thick. Still, I cannot wait to know what is hidden. It brings to mind 1 Corinthians 3:1-2 "Brothers, I could not address you as spiritual but as worldly—mere infants in Christ. I gave you milk, not solid food, for you were not yet ready for it. Indeed, you are still not ready." That is how the Lord addresses me when I seek to know what the future holds. Yet, I cannot help but ask.

There is so much that I want to know. What is love? How is it recognized? How can I best serve God? What can I do to learn how to use my faults and my gifts to draw others nearer to Christ? Where will I be in ten years? In four years? In three? Will I have a career? Will I be married? Will I have children? Will I be alive? Will I have all of my senses? Will all of my family be alive? Will I have the same friends?

I have much to look forward to and so many questions. Some days I become so caught up in the whirl of life that when I finally get a moment to be calm and quiet I don't know what to do with myself. My mind quickly becomes filled. Sometimes, I slip away into a quiet world, away from all the noise and chaos. Still, my heart is so full. There are so many things that I hope and long for. It's so difficult to be patient, especially when my heart keeps pulling me toward some strange new future.

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